I’ve been having some vision problems due to one of the many medicines I’m currently taking for my host of ills. At least I think it’s one of the medicines. It could have been that, when I was dry-heaving for three days prior to my most recent hospitalization, I ruptured the laser surgery I had in December to fix a crack in my retina. I won’t know until I fly to Honolulu next Friday and see the specialist.
What I do know is that by about 2 p.m. I’m pretty much blind and it is very hard to see unless I have my right eye closed. So, I’ve been wearing an eye-patch in the afternoons. This is good for a couple of reasons. One, it allows me to satisfy my pirate fantasy I’ve had since I’ve been a wee lad. Two, leering at the pretty girls that work at the hair salon across the street is much better when wearing an eye patch. No one leers like a one-eyed pirate. At least not me as a one-eyed pirate.
Now, if I could just find someone who will fuck me while I am wearing this thing. Prepare to be boarded. Now that would be special. If you’re out there, (call me).
What, just ’cause I’m blind you think I can’t still fuck? Please.
And, to all you representatives of the external, don’t even think for a second that just because I can’t see you, that I don’t still hate every single one of you.